BOND

Accepted to: 5 Schools

Waitlisted to: 3 Schools

Rejected to: 5 Schools

The old me would have beat myself down, my self-esteem would have dropped.

But I thank God for this new found confident and faith. I know everything is in His hands.

Thank Him for the awesome colleges that I did get into. I continue to seek Him for the schools that I'm waitlisted for and financial aid.

I learn this past few weeks to be still, I learn not to fear no more about tomorrow, I learn also not to care about what's happening currently but just be patient and rejoice in Him in all things!

My dad has been hoping for me to get into Brown. But I got rejected. I was not sad or disappointed at all but being the caring father he is...

he told me, "It's alright. I'm still so proud of you. GIVE ME A HUG! (comes and embraces me) I think you're so smart."

I love my dad because he has always put me and my sister first in everything. I love him because he's not like any other asian parent that would have been angry with me for not getting into the top colleges in the country.

I love him because at my time of needs he is there to encourage me sometimes not directly due to the "manly" image.

But guards down what he said touched me so much, it gave me a boost of confident.

That one gesture was more than enough.

I love you Daddy, thank you for everything.

- Courage Man

P.S.

I wish I can find more time to blog. But there's just so much to do.

Must get my head in the game!

Confession #1

I love my gmail!

Goals: TO PRESS FOR THE PRIZE!

Amazing!

Just recently made a SKYPE account. Pretty amazed right now with this new found program even though I told everyone I was not going to make one.

But I must admit it's pretty coolios. AIM seems to be old school now.

Though skype is cool I'm pretty overwhelm with all these new technology. Facebook, Gchat, Twitter, tumblr, Skype, now facetime.

It seems too much for me. I promise myself to never making a twitter. Facebook is enough for me. But thinking about all these technology I must cut down my time on these websites also.

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This week I have been feeling under the weather. Coughing and sneezing been accompanying me all week. But despite of that it has been great.

Celebrated our Pastor 40th birthday this Saturday. It was a blessing and it was just great spending time with my Fellowship Mission Family.

Afterwards went fellowshipping with my BELOVES! At boston bowl then Victoria Diner.

Sunday Service was on fire as usual. But there was such a strong anointing today in the Sanctuary.

It's not explainable.

Sometimes the most powerful feelings and most wonderful days cannot be transcribe into words.

As I'm blogging my day right now it sounds so plain but in reality it was so amazing.

Seeing God working in my life everyday.

Somethings just can't be explain...its all in your heart and in your memories.

Weekends like these are unforgettable. I won't forget what God has promise to do in my life.

I won't forget all the laughters and fellowships

I won't forget the talk I had in the car with someone.

I won't forget how AMAZING God is..EVER!

...something was lifted off my chest today after service. talking to a particular someone. I didnt know how to react when they came up to me to say what they needed to say...though things didn't go according to my PLANS.

I'm grateful God still worked it out.

I didn't have the confidence in facing them..... instead of me confronting to them they came to me.

I was upset at first just because i knew someone approach them for me...but as I sat there thinking...maybe that was meant to be.

Though I don't have the answers...I'm glad it is over with...

Through this specific situation...

I found out how no one would ever intentionally attempt to hurt me...

and I found out how much people do care about me that they would get upset and angry for me...I'm touch and grateful.

I give thanks to my all my family and friends.

And to my highest Honors of gratitude to my Love and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

Reminders: Godly Ambitious, I Believe God

- Courage Man

P.S When you don't know what to say, just call on His name.

POW!

At Prayers tonight I realize this season is hard for everybody. Some people have to go through health, strength, believe, financial crisis.... I realize I'm not alone...everyone struggles made mine seem so small but thats not the focus, I believe were all in this together.

God thank you for all the wonderful people in my life. I thank you for my Fellowship Mission Family, grateful for each and every saint. Help us to stay on one accord and continue to rejoice in you. Sanctify us and strengthen us through this storm. Let us not settle for less but continue to strive higher in You and your purpose. Purify my heart to learn to be giver and learn to love unconditionally just like you have despite what I feel and what I see. God I want to be made over again, put in the fire and let your holy hands MOLD me in your PERFECT image. God you're my strength and through you I can do ANYTHING! Discipline my flesh, help me to read your Word daily. Help me also to work on my OWN salvation and not look at others. I love you God, pray you will have your way today.

In Jesus Precious name, Amen

What I told a sister earlier and a message to myself: STAY ENCOURAGE & PRESS ON!

- Courage Man

"Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded" James 4:8

I had a really powerful prayer this morning. Where I felt really intimate to God like I have never did before. I felt like I was really honest to Him and finally address somethings in my life that I told Him before but never had I pour it whole in prayers.

It felt good like something was finally off my chest. I can't say everything has been good. There been its ups and downs.

Only God and I know but never really have I given up my situation to the Lord. And that was what I was lacking, talking to Him.

What goods are my thoughts? Wrestling with your emotions and your mind?

When I finally really prayed on it, I discover new things inside of me that was hidden which God already see but I havent.

The power of prayers is amazing.

After getting a taste this morning, I just want to be realer with God and to be closer to Him. He does not ask of me a fancy prayer. Or asking me to be conscious on what I pray on.

But just the truth.

I hope to be more honest to God, let Him have the whole of me and not hold back on my thoughts.

...........

This past Friday/Saturday we had our City Debate Tournament..the last debate tournament of the season and the last debate for my high school career.

I prayed hard and I tried to keep my faith but on Saturday I was losing my faith in getting into the quarters since I havent made it throughout the whole season.

As we were waiting for the results, I was losing a bit of faith until the results came out. I looked at the paper just to see my name (and partner) on the quarterfinals sheet. I was SHOCK.

God never cease to amaze me. He never fails.

I felt guilty that I have even doubted Him. But I thank Him for proving Himself to me.

He can NEVER fail me.

It was a bit disappointing when me and my partner thought we made it to semi but it turned out that they messed up the ballots. It was a heart breaking moment. But I still give thanks to God to even making it to the quarters.

I thought to myself, "Wow what if I had just a lil bit more faith?"

I wouldnt know now, I wish I could change my attitude but I'm just going to have to learn NOW and find new opportunities to test my faith in God.

No matter what He is still great and MIGHTY! No other God I know.

Yesterday at church a sister testified saying how much she loves God in every bone in her body. So powerful. It bought chills to my soul.

Lately there been some disappointments, somethings I can't understand, and frustration.

God help me to be more temperate, to be more patient, and to have more faith in you.

Transform me, mold me God in the image of your purpose. God, sometimes when we look down on ourselves or even the people in the world put us down. God you're the one who comes and pick me up. God when I don't see anything good in myself. You always seem to see some value in me. I thank you God. Teach me today Lord despite of everything that I learn to be patient and wait as long as it take for you to come through and for you to make me whole. Because it's about your will not mine. Through the storms and the sunshines God teach me to love everything unconditionally just like you did. I'm not perfect but the God I serve is. How bless am I!

Amen

- Courage Man

So Far So Good

Ever since we came back from Feb break, I have been really busy. I havent found time to go on this blog.

But I'm pushing myself to write especially so far this week been awesome! Must take note on that!

Since yesterday I have been constantly bumping into old friends. I don't think I have ever heard my name screamed from the other side of the street as many times as these last 2 days. Lol.

It is pretty amazing you must ask me. It's good to bump sometimes with people you havent seen for so long just because there is just something "different" when you see each other. Theres so much excitement and to me there seems to be MORE to talk about (this magic does not work through text!).

I was happy to see all the old faces! These moments are special because they're so rare. (Especially when it keeps happening!)

Some good news at the Office:

1. FINALLY made a 3 DIGIT PAYCHECK! What! What! There is an AWESOME (i think the word of the day today is awesome..hmmers) feeling especially when you earned yourself.

I been trying to look for a second job. Though I love my job at the Law Firm, a second job might be useful since I don't work long at the office.

2. I made my FIRST official friend yesterday. I know I have been working there since August and it sounds sad that maybe NOW i finally made a friend. (Shoot me for being a social outcast!) I do talk to all my co-workers and we may joke sometimes. But I only see those as a small talk, a kind friendly gesture to fill in the awkwardness and boredom. And being the only high school student in the office, I'm not really close with everyone.

What I notice about working in the office is, everyone kind of do their own thing. No one really offer to help unless you ask. I sat next to this new girl in one of the intern room. I had to constantly get for some markers/pens from the other end of the table on her side but she noticed and put the cup of pens in between me and her.

I was abash at this small act of kindness. No one in the office would have really done that for me. Unless the copier is jam and we all need it...but her action really stuck to me for the longest minute and bought a smile inside me.

She kept looking my way like she was reluctant to say what she wanted to say. But in the end, she made a comment on how the beautiful the view was. I looked out too, being on the 33th floor the view was sure beautiful. We both took a second to glaze at the city then went back to our work.

But I guess that was just a unspoken ice breaker. Next thing you know I was offering her my skittles and from there we just kept talking throughout the day.

We had some laughters and weird observations about women body builders.

She was shock that I was only a high school student and though she goes to the same Law School as most intern does at my Law Firm. Unlike them she was only in her first year while most of them are in their 3rd.

Maybe that was the weird connection between us. We were both kind of an outsider but of course we're VERY COOL!

She left before me since there was no more work for her. Leaving me alone to think by myself next to the window with the AWESOME view of the city. I felt kind of giddy inside. Call me lame if you want, but it just felt like kindergarten again where you met your first friend on the playground and you just KNOW you guys are going to be the BEST of friends forever. That is how it felt.

But who knows, might be fantasizing...and if I ever shared this story with her she might think I'm a creep. Hahas!

Overall this week has been going really well despite how busy I'am.

I'm grateful for the new and old faces.

Thank God for giving me new opportunities and AWESOME friends! May He continue to pour me more love so I may shared it with others. More opportunities so I may do good work in Him. And let HIM continue to work in me.

- Courage Man

P.S To my lil PIA I'm so glad you got into the 5 week Berklee Program. God is SOO GOOD. Thank Him tremendously for letting me witness such miraculous blessings in your life! Pray that He continue to prosper you and to do GREAT works that He has call you to do! Love you!

Word of the Day:

"From henceforth let no man trouble me: for I bear in my body the marks of the Lord Jesus."

Ephesians 6:17

Hmmers!

I want to learn to appreciate the simple things in life and not always be aiming for something so high. Because what I already have worth so much more.

Love and Appreciate

When you dont know....

When you don't know what to do, get on your face and pray!