Letter 2

Dear God,
I want to learn how to be satisfied with having only you. I struggle with acceptance and approval of others...I notice that recently and I think I have always known that subconsciously. But today I just want to learn to be satisfied with having you because God if you're the only thing I have I believe and I KNOW that you're enough. Why do I struggle with this Lord? Why do I feel the need to impress others or the need in trying to get people's attention when those who don't care about me...should not matter.
True love begins with you Jesus.
Today I was with someone and they were reading some of the letters people have wrote to them. I look back over her life and realize how so many people want to get to know her for someone who CLAIMS to be shy and quiet. And I looked at her and realized, "Wow she is so loved." I thank God for what you're doing in her life because I realize in the areas where we lacked...when we believed we weren't good enough...and can't be loved. You come into our lives and become our provider and put people in our lives to show us how loved we are. I look at my friend and I remember the things she use to struggle with and thought how great you're. Jesus I want that. I want to experience true friendship and love without trying to earn it myself..without trying to win people over. It is a hard concept I have to accept about myself but I must learn from it. And I thank you for allowing me to see it. I am not ashamed because I know I am not perfect. But I serve a perfect God...and I know it begins today for me to stop trying and start living. Stop trying to impress but begin to really start shining. I allow you God to put new people in my life and even allow old relationships that were dead to grow. There are so many possibilities but I pray God that you would put the RIGHT relationships in my life whether they're old or new.
I also can't forget the day when 3 people came up to me and told me there was something special about me. I hold on to their words till this day not because I am trying to be cocky. But I am trying to make my unbelief to believe in the moments where I doubt...when I think I am not good enough. That I am able and there is more to my life than what I see right now. I thank you God also for using these 3 people to encourage me. You're wonderful and truly God you're awesome especially in my weaknesses. Help me to stay encourage and help me to stop worrying about what other people are doing. But just continue to follow you and have some faith in MYSELF.
I am beautiful...because God you created me.
I am intelligent...because You gave me a mind to worship and to repent.
I am loved...because You died on the cross for me.
I am able...because You're my strength.
Jesus you're my everything...you never said this road would be easy. You never said being mold and remake in your hand was going to be painless but the outcome is going to be worth it. I know every good thing will take time. Character, prosperity, victory, breakthrough, deliverance.... But Lord like you said in James...to let patience have her perfect work. I will wait on you to make me ALL over again into something NEW and better! In the mean time...I will labour in you Jesus. I will cry unto you. I will worship you. I will praise you.
Keep taking care of me along the way. Thank you in advance.

Love your daughter, Mandy.